After seeing the status
I started having suicidal thoughts on my bus ride home.
Considering about the many ways that i could put an end to my unsuccessful life:
sleeping pills/ or
cutting wrist/ or
getting hit by a car.
Then I thought about my responsibilities.
what my parents would have to go through if they were to lose their only child to whom they have devoted their lives to raise
To end my life without having accomplished nothing is pathetic. extremely.
and to end my life only leaving people feeling nothing but heartbroken is ugly.
but again, i wouldn't be this pessimistic if i am a successful being. by any definition.
cant remember exactly since when
luck is never on my side no more
i know well enough that luck is never with lazy mother fuckers
yet deep in my mind, i kept thinking that i would make the cut.
kept picturing that i would be able to start fresh if given the opportunity.
an opportunity to redefine myself. to rekindle the passion for life.
before i get a reply
i hope everything is just a mistake.
i pray for that to be a mistake.
please Lord.
